Sunday, August 21, 2011

Yes, my mind does work that way...

So I saw this graphic at WhatWouldJackDo.net (via Infidel753):


But I've got this bad habit of thinking about stuff.

$1,250, at $10 a minute, is only a little over two hours of actual work... of suckage... of... of having random people clamp themselves on one of your fake nipples. So that's not too bad, I guess, for walking around the beach, getting some fascinating tan marks, for eight to ten hours.

Mother's milk is... body-temperature margaritas? Really? I guess that explains why babies do nothing but sleep, drink and cry.

This is not a job for large-breasted women, though - the flatter you are, the more storage capacity you'll have.

To be exact, $1,250 is 125 minutes (roughly 62 minutes per fake tit). 125 different people (assuming nobody goes for seconds). How do you sanitize a fake nipple? Does she even bother? She probably should, but I'm thinking that a bleach wipe-down might affect the flavor of the margarita.

Looking at her, she probably hasn't breast-fed a baby (I could be wrong, but let's just move past that). Will she ever, now? Wouldn't that cause some weird feelings about the whole experience?

I know where the fundies will come down on this issue: running in smaller and smaller circles, shrieking "Sin! Sign of the the end times! Whore!" However, from a vaguely more enlightened standpoint, I'm not sure what I think about this. Is she being exploited for her sexuality? Or is she exploiting the guys for being prisoners of their hormones?

What, exactly, is the back of the booze-bra made of? I know that a lot of guys hope for clear plastic, but considering sweating and vinyl... and sticking... ewww... just ewww!

And most importantly, does she prorate? If you only want 30 seconds of margarita, can you get that for five dollars?

1 comment:

Auntie D said...

Loved this. She's probably not in the U.S. as she'd never get away with it. I don't think anyone's being exploited... their both getting what they want. Anyway, I did get my laugh today. Enjoy your blogs.